I guess I've always been waiting for signs that you would like to patch up. 不在乎，是假的。不敢理，才是真的。Afraid that we'll ended in the terrible fight that we used to have, I rather 事无不见，假装不在乎。Till to a point that I thought I've succeeded. But I was wrong. You had came back to the lab more often now. Seeing you more often, makes me nervous. I think that's when I started having visions of patching up and waiting for a time best to do so.

I thought christmas would be a good time, since there'll be gift exchange. But you had came in way early to place the gift on the table, with a post it note, w/o you signing off. Even w/o your name, I was able to recognize your handwriting. I wouldn't say that I'm not disappointed but I was more pleased that I'm able to receive a gift from you. Someone mentioned to me about how poorly wrapped it is, as if a last minute one. I then had some reservations and decided to silently/secretly place my gift on your desk.

I'm pretty unsure of my guesses now. I'm not sure whether we are walking towards the path towards reconciling or the total opposite direction. I'm not good in gambling so I'm not going to gamble this status quo of ours w/o knowing whether we are in the right direction...

If you are reading and you know I'm saying about you. I just hope to say a big THANK YOU for all the help you had gave me. Trust me, I didn't want us to end up this way. Even if we stay as where we are, it's a big THANK YOU!